Dean Shaw

Things are really heating up in the 2013 Twitter Madness Tourney, and by “heating up” I mean no one really gives a shit, except for about half of the remaining contestants. The rest are all, like, “Twitter Madness what?” and “I don’t get it” and “Like I give a rat’s ass.”  So with enthusiasm at an all–time high let’s take a look at the Sweet 16 match-ups and who makes it through to the Elite 8

Featured Match-Up: @adage v. @unmarketing*: 

For the first time in Twitter Madness Tourney history a competitor has tweeted about bacon and lost their match.  The “Bacon Strategy” as it has become to be known, is widely used, often in desperation, but always successfully since the Twitter Madness Tournament started in 1954.  In this case however, @adage chose to bury the tweet amongst an unusual amount of Agency gobbledygook thus minimizing its “Wow!” appeal.

And while @unmarketing was rather quiet during this crucial Sweet 16 match-up, he did take time to post a nifty xtranormal video about Social Media ROI Conversations.  ‘So what?’ you ask? Well I for one appreciate the time it takes to slap one of those together, having done a few myself.  Making it funny or interesting is an even bigger challenge but @unmarketing manages to do both.  Now, was his better than the ones I’ve done?  Well, I’ll let you be the judge of that….

@unmarketing Masterpiece: The Social Media ROI Conversation

@deanshaw Masterpiece: The Adventures of Social Media Guy 

Whichever you prefer, the win goes to the guy who put the “un” into marketing.
Winner: @unmarketing

And now on to the rest of the Sweet 16 Action…

@HubSpot v. @jowyang: So @HubSpot offered a plethora of amazing content that will make you a better online marketer.  @jowyang on the other hand Re-Tweeted one of my blog posts, and showed us he’s not the Super Human we thought he was by screwing up his math:

That obvious and intentional display of mathematical miscalculation won my heart.
Winner: @jowyang

@GinaMcCrae v. @frankreed: I’ll have to admit, for a first time Twitter Madness Tourney participant, @GinaMcCrae certainly has swagger, look,for example, at this initial tweet in her match-up with Twitter Madness veteran @FrankReed –

Of course, what @GinaMcCrae doesn’t know is that in the 42 year history of the Twitter Madness Tourney, no one with self-respect has ever won the championship.  That aside, it wasn’t the brashness or self-respect that won @GinaMcCrae this improbably victory, it was the fact that @frankreed only tweeted once.  Talk about no self-respect.
Winner: @GinaMcCrae

@JustinKownacki v. @leeodden: @leeodden tweeted a lot about conferences.  Among other things, @JustinKownacki shared stuff like this:

Somehow conferences don’t seem all that important.
Winner: @JustinKownacki

@SocialMedia411 v. @MicheleJKiss: The Displaced Aussie in Boston/Partner, Web Analytics Demystified/Gadget nerd/Drinker of Apple Kool-Aid was awesome as always, and @SocialMedia411 continued to offer a consistent stream of great info. In the end they ended up in a statistical tie – only the second in the 72 year history of the tournament.  According to Rule 42, Section 8, Paragraph 3 of the Twitter Madness Tourney Rules, the tie goes to the one who has Carl from Caddyshack on their Twitter page. Gunga Galungda
Winner: @SocialMedia411

@jimsterne v. @kaimac: Highlights of @jimsterne during match-up:

1. Bacon
2. Two, yes two published articles

• How To Speak Big Data: A CMO’s Guide
• Analytics Is Like Driving

3. And this guy:

Highlights of @kaimac during match-up:

Advantage: virtue
Winner: @kaimac

@FYeahAnalytics v. @AndyBeal: And in the Battle Royale of the Sweet Sixteen, @FYeahAnalytics and @AndyBeal traded Twitter Reply’s on subjects that included scary avatars, bacon, and 404 Error pages – a true battle between two Twitter Titans. It was a competition so close I called my Mom for guidance. She told me @AndyBeal was the son she wanted me to be and that other guy had a curse word in his name.
Winner: @andybeal

And now on to the Elite 8

To check out the brackets go to @deanshaw Twitter Madness 2013 Brackets

For more info on the tourney check out my 2013 Twitter Madness Tourney Page

Round 2 Summary

The competition heated up in round 2 of the 2013 Twitter Madness Tourney as the participants vied for a coveted spot in the Sweet Sixteen.  It was a round full of twist and turns and the first ever “double elimination”.  Yes two competitors were so equally horrible that I eliminated both of them.  To fill the void I made the unprecedented move to grant the much desired spot to a loser in another match-up. They don’t call it Twitter Madness for nothing. Let this be a lesson to the field

of sixteen. If you commit Twitter atrocities during this tournament you not only disrespect me, but you disrespect your country, the Corps, and your Mama.

For the winners, see you in the Sweet Sixteen.  For the Losers, grab your bags and go home!

Featured Match-up: @mental_floss v. @jimsterne

Let’s just get the record straight, you don’t become the Twitter Madness Champion by being some ham ‘n’ egger with a Twitter account. It takes all kind of social savvy and digital acumen to reach the Twitter Madness Tourney mountain top.  So it’s not surprising, that @jimsterne played his second round match-up like a fiddle, nay, a Stradivarius.  So what did he do right this time?

1. He re-tweeted my wrap-up from Round 1 and acknowledge that in doing so he violated Tweet Type 3 in my List of 27 Tweet Types
2. He mentioned “poop” in a tweet.
3. He dropped some of his own content on us with “Analytics Misery Loves Company”
4. And if that wasn’t enough, he re-tweeted a linked to my presentation at the upcoming #eMetrics Conference. I hope I’ll see all of you there!

Winner: @jimsterne

And now let’s take a look at the other exciting match-ups…

@FastCompany v. @spikejones: FastCompany is most certainly a firehouse of great content that they tweet day and night, night and day.  It’s a virtually ongoing education on business, technology…and pandas apparently.  But you know that person you meet at a party that corners you and drones on and on, endlessly about a bunch of shit you just don’t care that much about and you just want to punch him in the face and tell him to shut the fuck up.  That person is FastCompany. They tweeted a total of 134 times in the 2 day match-up with @spikejones.  As for Spike, he tweeted a mere 8 times and said something about zombies and hating you.  Advantage: Spike Jones
Winner: @spikejones

@unmarketing v. @TheFakeESPN: If you’re a sports fan you should definitely be following the always funny @TheFakeESPN. As a bonus they have an picture of bacon on their Twitter page – and nothing scores points in the Twitter Madness Tourney quite like bacon.  On the other side is @unmarketing who is self-admittedly “kind of a big deal on a fairly irrelevant soc media site which inflates his self-importance.”  Bacon wins. Bacon always wins.
Winner: @TheFakeESPN

@adage v. @1918: Phil, why dost thou beseech me?  Last year’s Tournament Cinderella could only muster up a couple tweets in the 2^nd round match-up against Ad Age. That was meager enough to hand the win to @adage
Winner: @adage

@ovrdrv v. @TheFakeCNN: I never thought it would be possible for both sides to lose but the performance of @ovrdrv AND @TheFakeESPN was so underwhelming it was impossible to determine a winner.  So, in an unprecedented move the Commissioner has ruled that both will be bounced from the tournament and @unmarketing who lost to a picture of  bacon will be granted a second chance.  The Commissioner also announced that “Raspberry-Frosted Pop-Tarts are friggin’ awesome.” Film at 11.
Winner: @unmarketing

@HubSpot v. @AudienceCreator:  Twitter madness Tourney Rookie tweeted something about “hidden bacteria lurking on your mobile device just as I was taking a big lick off my iPhone. Not cool @AudienceCreator. Not. Cool.
Winner: @HubSpot

@jowyang v. @webby2001: In my Twitter Madness Tourney Rules I forgot to mention one very important point: “not feeling an ounce of guilt for loving Ambrosia” disqualifies you from the competition. Sorry @webby2001, that’s just how much I feel.
Winner: @jowyang

@GinaMcCrae v. @chuckhemann: The brash rookie from Cleveland continued her aggressive play in round two even poking her nose into the @FYeahAnalytics v. @erictpeterson match-up.  But she made an almost fatal mistake late in the match-up when she actually tweeted the term “Mmm duhLISH” sensing she’d really fucked up she quickly followed that up with a tweet about “Pancakewiches” which acted as the antidote to her previous misstep.  As for @chuckhemann, he spent the first part of the match traveling and then pissed me of by tweeting about being at Ruth’s Chris Steak House and eating apple tarts.
Winner: @GinaMcCrae

@frankreed v. @DavidBThomas: Frank started strong out of the gate tweeting about cheese and doughnuts and then gave us the history of Internet Meme’s. As for @DavidBThomas he offered up only a couple tweets during the match-up, but to be honest, he’s at his most brilliant on Facebook, check him out there!
Winner: @frankreed

@JustinKownacki v. @cnmoody:  There are times I wished @JustinKownacki would just wear a GoPro video camera so I could follow him around all day. Granted he uses a lot of fancy words sometimes and is way smarter than me, but the tweets I do understand and his observations on everyday live are pure gold. Nothing wrong with you @cnmoody, you just ran up against a tough Twitter hombre this time  <mental note: ask @JustinKownacki what ‘hombre” means>.
Winner: @JustinKownacki

@SeinfeldToday v. @leeodden: Would 4 measly tweets from the always brilliant @SeinfeldToday be enough to topple the Online Marketing Master?  Not this time Jerry. What is the deal with that?
Winner: @leeodden

@avinash v. @SocialMedia411: @avinash is one of the most renowned practitioners in my field of analytics and I love him like a brother, but following @SocialMedia411 is like getting a free education in new media.
Winner: @SocialMedia411

@GinnySkal v. @MicheleJKiss: @GinnySkal (why do I always read that as SkinnyGal?) is a force of nature here in the Triangle but she has two passions I can’t get with, cats and Pat Sajak. Fortunately for @MicheleJKiss she only shares one of those passions…unless she would like to publicly declare her love for Mr. Sajak?????   Barring a last minute admission, the edge here goes to @MicheleJKiss
Winner: @MicheleJKiss

@iowahawkblog v. @kaimac: OK, I’ll be honest here. @kaimac wins because I’m tired of @iowahawkblog’s right wing crap and because Brooklyn Brutus is the wind beneath @kaimac’s wings
Winner: @kaimac

@FYeahAnalytics v. @erictpeterson: In a stunning development, @FYeahAnalytics wins by forfeit as @erictpeterson declares that “Twitter is not a game”
Winner: @FYeahAnalytics

@mitchjoel v. @AndyBeal: I just talked to my Mom on the phone. She said that @AndyBeal is the son she wanted me to be, so I guess he wins this round.  It helps that @mitchjoel only tweeted 3 times during the match-up 😉
Winner: @AndyBeal

So there you have it, the Sweet 16 of the 2013 Twitter Madness Tourney.  Good luck to all and to all a good night!

Ya know who should win the @deanshaw Twitter Madness Tourney this year? Me, that’s who.  I mean this on-going monitoring and analysis of my brackets is a freakin’ pain in the ass.  But alas, I am barred from participating in the event because of my overwhelming advantage.

So, the 1^st round is in the books and as expected there we’re some stunning upsets.  That’s the beauty of this tournament you don’t have to be a “Rock Star” or “Ninja” or even a “Guru”. You can be just a regular old hack like @andybeal and still advance in Twitter Madness.  All you need is some interesting or clever tweets and you can have your own “One Shining Moment”  My GAWD that song is horrible.

Let’s take a look at my in depth analysis that I just wasted 3 hours on and see who’s in and who’s out…

FEATURE MATCH-UP: @chrisbrogan v. @GinaMcCrae 

It always warms the cockles of my heart when I see a virtual unknown embrace the Twitter Madness Tourney and step up to the plate oblivious to the challenge that lay ahead.  Such was the case in the epic 1^st Round match-up we saw in McCrae vs. Brogan. In a Titanic upset the wunderkind David from Cleveland upset the Goliath of all things Twitter.  The Tourney newbie seemed un-intimidated and play surprisingly well by mocking my tourney.  A ballsy move by the Twitter Tourney diaper dandy.

@deanshaw Twitter Madness Tourney Gets Mocked

Not to be openly mocked @deanshaw mocks the mocker:

@deanshaw Mocks the Mocker

McCrae brilliantly followed my mock of her mock with another mock, pulling off the first ever double-mock meme in the history of the tournament

As for Chris, he ain’t got time fo dat.
Winner: @GinaMcCrae

And now a summary of the other exciting matchups…
@FastCompany v. @mikewhitmore: Fast Company’s tweet barrage (almost 200 unique in total) was way too much for Former digital anthropologist, entrepreneur, husband, blogger, musician, professional speaker, networker & Nutella lover
Winner @FastCompany

@spikejones v. @jtobin: While Jim brought an interesting NCAA Bracket based on Twitter presence the wily Spike Jones let others do the talking for him while he spoke at some Word of Mouth thingy dingy. Talk about advocacy!
Winner: @spikejones

@unmarketing v. @jamieplesser: Like @spikejones, @unmarketing let his audience speak for him including quoting him on this gem “The difference between a person with 7 years retail experience and 1 year, is the person with 7 years hates people more.” Since I’ll probably shamelessly steal that I may as well give him entre to the next round.
Winner: @unmarketing

@TheFakeESPN v. @SmallsMeasures: Tough matchup for Smalls and @TheFakeESPN didn’t choke it away
Winner: @The FakeESPN

@adage v. @HelenASPopkin: Could Ad Age AND Helen Popkin both forgotten about their matchup?  A decidedly underwhelming performance by both goes to Ad Age for including Oreos and Kit Kats n the same tweet.
Winner: @adage

@unbounce v. @1918: In the best match-up of the day, last year’s tournament darling @1918 stood toe to toe with the Canadian un-bounce advocates. When the match ended in a statistical tie, I had to go to the rules books which clearly states in Rule 219, Article 3 that “in the event of a statistical tie, the win will be awarded to the person who tweets about BBQ the most.”
Winner: @1918

@JudahWorldChamp v. @ovrdrv: Both competitors played sloppy twittering but OverDrive was less bad than Judah.
Winner: @ovrdrv

@TheFakeCNN v. @CoreyCreed: The Fake CNN is just way too funny in thi matchup and beat out the Internet Marketing Guru
Winner: @TheFakeCNN

@HubSpot v. @SquareJawMedia:  SquareJaw can only muscle out 4 tweets and gets buried by an avalanche of HubSpot informational goodness
Winner: @HubSpot

@anjeanettec v. @AudienceCreator: Audience Creator won by default as the comedy of Anjeanette took an unfortunate hiatus during the matchup
Winner: @AudienceCreator

@jowyang v. @digitalalex: Wait, I wonder if Digital Alex was hanging with @anjeanettec the past few days as he was curiously absent from his matchup with @jowyang
Winner: @jowyang

@webby2001 v. @glenngabe: Another close battle, with Webby edging out Gabe because of some original content and I think he said something about brisket.
Winner: @webby2001

@chuckhemann v. @RudiShumpert: Are you effing kidding me Shumpert? I give you entre into the biggest Twitter Tournament on the planet and you tweet 4 times including a RT and one mentioning Klout? I can’t wait to see you at eMetrics so I can give you a piece of my mind…and a drink…I recall I owe you a drink.
Winner: @chuckhemann

@MarkRaganCEO v. @frankreed: Wait…what??? MarkRaganCEO didn’t even tweet during his matchup?  Are you kidding me? Are you getting your Tourney advice from @RudiShumprt or something???
Winner: @FrankReed

@DavidBThomas v. @Cole_Watts: Dave Thomas started off using the “I’ll just be the scribe for @ToddWheatland” tweet strategy which hasn’t been used in over 45 years, and just when I was about to vanquish him to the loser pile he said something about a coupon for ‘Critter Removal”
Winner: @DavidBThomas

@TheOnion v. @JustinKownacki: I knee jerk reaction was to just give this to @TheOnion, but Justin’s observations on everyday life were just to good…and always are.
Winner: @JustinKownacki

@cnmoody v. @stevehall: Moody plays small but comes up big.  Sometimes less is more.
Winner: @cnmoody

@SeinfeldToday v. @carlsonjill: I guess Jill didn’t want to come out to play. Seinfeld wins by default
Winner: @SeinfeldToday

@leeodden v. @JayDolan: Lee wasn’t at his best but he was good enough to slip by at Jay kid.
Winner: @leeodden

@avinash v. @awarenessinc: Two legendary competitors stumbled during their matchup but @Avinash said something about the snooze button…and I freaking LOVE the snooze button.
Winner: @avinash

@SocialMedia411 v. @mktgdouchebag: Despite passing along a great video with David Bowie and Sonic Youth  and a FREAKING great Social Media Strategy Generator , the Social Media 411 wins based on volume of great content
Winner: @SocialMedia411

@dmscott v. @GinnySkal: In another big upset, @GinnySkal squeaks out a victory over the heavily favored @dmscott despite picking Marquette to go all the way in the NCAA Tournament
Winner: @GinnySkal

@gemise v. @MicheleJKiss: @gemise violated Tweet Type 3 too many times and was disqualified
Winner: @MicheleJKiss

@mental_floss v. @coreyspencer: Apparently @coreyspencer is a Canadian living in Utah who LIKES movies, comic books, video games, digital marketing and analytics, but LOVES his sweet wife and 3 insane little boys but DOESN’T tweet during the Twitter Madness Tourney
Winner: @mental_floss

@jeffreylcohen v. @jimsterne: Last year’s Twitter Madness Tourney Champion wins because if he doesn’t he’ll throw another pox on my house and because I’m scared he’ll beat me up at next month’s eMetrics Conference.
Winner: @jimsterne

@iowahawkblog v. @zachward: Ya know how I said I follow some people cuz they piss me off? @iowahawkblog is one of those people and yet he advances to the next round. WTF is wrong with me?
Winner: @iowahawkblog

@badbanana v. @kaimac: @BadBanana picked the wrong time to be bad. @kaimac advances
Winner: @kaimac

@wwwbigbaldhead v. @FYeahAnalytics: I had high hopes for my favorite zombie killer but apparently slaying the dead doesn’t mean slaying the Twitter competition.
Winner: @FYeahAnalytics

@lruettimann v. @erictpeterson: Eric has blocked me from seeing his Tweets and has disavowed the Twitter Madness Tourney altogether.  A savvy show of reverse psychology if ever I saw one – and for that he advances to the next round.

Eric Peterson is undecided

Eric Peterson is still undecided

Winner: @erictpeterson

@mitchjoel v. @OMLee: Despite a killer Hot Dog Baseball Salary calculator that @OMLee offered to the world, Mitch wins due to his Canadianess.
Winner: @mitchjoel

@AndyBeal v. @johnlovett: You’re in the Twitter Madness Tourney and you only tweet once??? John you have disrespected your country, the Corps, and your Momma.
Winner: @AndyBeal

Congrats to the winners, you’re on to the 2nd round and even tougher competition.  For the losers, go on home and cry to your Mammys.

To check out the brackets go to: http://challonge.com/TwitterMadness2013